You can never really tell where it hurts….
Over the weekend, I read about the case of a man who told his driver to stop abruptly on a bridge, after which he got down from the vehicle and plunged into the lagoon immediately . He was reportedly taking a call when this happened. He was a doctor.
This is just one out of the numerous cases that happens around the world. We hear about some and others are blown away with the wind. This is an intense piece for me as I cannot begin to imagine what transpires within those nano seconds before ……. (dark space).
August Alsina’s song ‘Nobody Knows’ comes to mind. Nobody really knows the pain behind that smile…..
We only see the surface and assume we are all fine. The flashy cars, picture perfect lifestyle, fancy job titles, pictures of vacations and lunch at choice restaurants, SOCIAL MEDIA doesn’t make it easy. We never see the struggles and the pain.
Nobody knows what anyone goes through and that makes it easy to have a loose tongue. Our tongue cuts deeper than a knife and it is the easiest way to push anyone off the cliff. We are quick to judge, quick to call out, quick to snap at eachother, quick to hate, quick to make rules, quick to criticise, slow to listen and definitely blind to body language.
I imagine someone asking rhetorically,
- but if you have an issue , why not talk about it?
- but why didn’t he/she say anything?
- why did he/she not reach out to anyone?
Do we really need to know eachother’s problem before being mindful?
Do we have to wait for a sad occurrence that will make us say ‘If I had known’?
Do we have to know someone has a headache before we stop shouting?
Is a problem shared still a problem half solved? Or do we now take advantage of a shared problem?
It might be the most difficult thing but there is no justifiable reason to judge anyone if we do not walk in their shoes. Anthony Hamilton’s song ‘Walk in my shoes’ is deep. Imagine being at your lowest and still having to go about your daily activities, handle your relationship, face insensitive people, take in pressure from all areas and also hearing those mind voices that keeps giving you reasons why you are an apology to humanity.
That is a lot of burden if you ask me and one derogatory statement to someone who is already depressed is a sure catalyst for self destruction. But yet, who are we to question anyone’s choice if we did not know where it hurts?
(I do not know so much about depression, I have not been there before hence I cannot talk about it extensively but I know depression is real and there are real people who go through it).
We need to understand that Not all wounds are visible!!!
We do not have to wait for a physical proof to realise someone is in pain. As much as we have regard for our well being and happiness, we need to extend that happiness to everyone around us.
In the pursuit of happiness, we come across several challenges that deter us, we cross hurdles and sometimes come out successful. What about those that get stuck?
Do we leave them to drown in regret? Or
Do we lend a helping hand?
If there is anything we all need, I know it is compassion. Compassion towards ourselves and everyone around us. You never know what a simple act of kindness can turn around.
- Some people have no idea how to speak about their problems, be kind enough to notice body language.
- Some people only know how to speak out by transfering aggression, be tolerable (A good example is Alicia in Una Maid en Manhattan).
- Stretch ‘small talk’ sometimes; have deep conversations, you never know what you will find out.
- Send out positive vibes.
- Smile at someone.
- Compliment eachother.
- Help as much as you can. (Some people will take this for granted).
- Be quick to listen and slow to speak.
- Reach out to that colleague you have not seen in a while.
- Give hugs…Sometimes a handshake is not enough.
- Be a shoulder to cry on.
- Teach someone to pray.
- Encourage team bonding.
- The little things count….open doors, pay for meals, offer a ride etc
The need to be compassionate can never be over-emphasized. We need to remind ourselves constantly as it is human to fall out of line once in a while.
As we go about our daily activities, always remember, ‘Not all wounds are visible’.
Sending hugs to everyone.
Love, Peace and Cupcakes